Sickly Sweet
by The Sage of Toads
Summary: A collaboration with Ezit Meti. Akane Tendo is a young woman with a big cheerful smile despite being a little clumsy, Ranma Saotome is a well-traveled young man who enjoys the martial arts but has a curse, and when they meet the fireworks of love will go off. This story is an eternal reminder that love, joy, and all that comes with it is possible for everyone.
1. Part 1

Disclaimer: Hello reader, Ranma ½ is property of Rumiko Takahashi, Studio Deen, Shogakukan, Viz Media, and Madman Entertainment. But this story? This story is for _**you.**_

 **Sickly Sweet  
** **Part 1**

"Okay, you can do this, it's just another house on the run."

He had heard about this house from the last guy. Something about a monster living in it. However, in the few times he'd done this run, he'd not seen hide nor hair of this so-called 'Pain-Engine' that allegedly crippled six previous postmen and at least one paramedic who responded to the call for help.

That wasn't to say he was not nervous, he was rightly scared out of his gourd. Still, he had the probability on his side. He hadn't gotten hurt, and it wasn't like those last six guys had all gotten hurt all in a row.

So he pressed on, approaching the front gate confident but ready to spring away in case he was attacked by whatever. He reached the gate of the compound, and listened. He heard no growls or movement, and when he peeked inside the gate, he saw no sign of a particularly large animal.

There was nothing there. He allowed himself to relax, there was nothing to be worried about-

"Good afternoon mister postman!" a cheery voice came from behind him.

The owner of the voice, Akane Tendo, blinked in confusion as she watched the postman cling to the top of the wall surrounding her home, whimpering in fear. "Wow you're fast."

Ceasing his trembling, the postman stared down at the cute long-haired high school girl. "D-do you live here?"

"Yes, I do," she replied. "I don't normally make it home so early, but I was able to easily beat the crowd this time."

The postman relaxed and made his way down from the wall, awkwardly setting one foot and then the other down before he dusted himself off. He was surprised to find Akane helping him, brushing the dirt off his back as he tended to his front. What a helpful young lady!

"Is there anything in your bag for me today?" she smiled just that little bit more.

The postman smiled back and dug into his bag. "Let's see, Tendo... Tendo... no, there's just a postcard for your father! That's all!"

He pulled out the postcard and held it to Akane. It was then that he noticed something was wrong with her. There were dark splotches all over the front of her navy blue school uniform. Dark red, wet splotches.

He stared at her smiling face, and realized that her neck had some of the splotches too... along with droplets of it dried on her face.

"Is that...?" he could not help himself to ask.

Akane gave a start, and looked down at herself. As if she hadn't realized it this whole time, she recoiled in surprise. "Oh! It's all over my uniform, I guess I'll have to throw it in the wash."

Her smile returning, she held out her hand, which the postman quickly saw was also soaked in blood, some of it still fresh. "I'll take it to him, mister postman!"

The more he stared at this girl, the more he saw there was something wrong. His eyes darted down to her feet. Her shoes and her socks were stained with blood, soaked in it. When they traced her footsteps, he found bloody shoeprints leading back up the street.

He looked back up at her smiling face, as she took the postcard from him, her fingers leaving bloodstains along its edges as she turned it over and read the chicken scratch on the back. "Bringing Ranma from China? Who's Ranma?"

She'd ask her father later. She looked to the Postman, who had backed himself up against the wall, and was trembling again. "Thank you... are you all right?"

Blood all over her, stories of injured postmen, "beating the crowd easily". Was she, was she the monster? "Uh... w-what happened? Why are you covered in... b-blood?"

Akane blinked again in bemusement. "Blood? This isn't blood, it's red bean paste."

She wiped some of the blood off her neck with her fingers and shoved them into his mouth. Indeed! It was sweet and delicious red bean paste.

"Huh?" the postman was confused.

"I'm kind of a klutz, you see," Akane explained, "I was walking along the top of the fence along the river and I fell into a Taiyaki stand. Red bean paste everywhere."

The postman relaxed again and laughed. "Oh, well that's a relief."

Akane laughed as well. "Come on, blood and red bean paste look nothing alike."

She then grabbed his hand in hers and immediately snapped his forearm with her free hand, creating a compound fracture that began to spray blood everywhere. "See the difference?"

The postman really couldn't see it, because he was screaming from the blinding pain he was in.

Inside the Tendo Home's sitting room, Nabiki Tendo lifted her head and looked towards the entrance. "Mail's here," she observed.

Kasumi Tendo sighed as she picked up the first aid kit and headed out the door. Soun Tendo just wept as he stared off into oblivion.

 **|Hey, how you doin'? This is a page break|**

It wasn't too bad this time. Not really. In the grand scheme of things it was a sign of improvement. She'd only broken his arm in one place. Just the one. A small mercy, and these days Kasumi took whatever mercy she could get. It wasn't as if Akane understood the meaning of the word.

By now she was used to the blood and the screaming, which was a worrying thought given the nightmares she used to have. Now? She ignored it and got on with cleaning up the mess. That's all it was. Akane had made a mess that needed to be cleaned up. Reset the arm, put it in a sling, find out his blood type and give him an emergency transfusion. She did it all in two minutes flat. By now she had more practise than most military field medics, and was fast enough to impress them.

The waiting was the worst part. It always was. What would she do next? And to whom would she do it? These were the questions lingering on Kasumi's mind as she wandered back inside her home. Who would be Akane's next vic-

"So daddy!" her little sister cheerily asked. Oh dear. "Who is Ranma?"

Well, she had a name for the next victim if nothing else. Poor Ranma, he wouldn't know what hit him. Or her. Kasumi could see it with the clarity of Cassandra, an apt metaphor since it was backed with the realisation she couldn't do a damned thing about it.

"Daddy!" Akane pouted when her father wouldn't answer her. He was still staring off into the abyss within his mind.

She looked over to Kasumi. "Daddy's ignoring me."

"He always does, it's how he copes," Nabiki pointed out.

"Daddy, you received a postcard." Kasumi took the postcard from Akane and held it in front of his face, blocking his view of eternity.

For a moment, there was no reaction. But then the tears he'd been shedding suddenly became cascades, as the barely legible writing triggered something in his severely traumatized brain. A memory, of a time of happiness, of a time where he was a man and where men were men and made vows as men.

"S-Saotome..." he weakly whispered as what looked like hope began to gleam in his sad, sad eyes.

His daughters all looked at him, bemused. "Saotome?"

Kasumi leaned over Soun's shoulder. "It's the person who wrote the postcard... they're bringing this Ranma per-"

Soun leaped to his feet, catching Kasumi in the chin and sending her spilling onto her back in a momentary daze.

"Oh, how I've waited for this day! The years, the days and nights!" he looked to Nabiki and Akane as he pointed to the postcard. Kasumi, who got up rubbing her chin, leaned in to look at it last.

"Genma Saotome is a very good friend of mine from my days of travel," Soun explained animatedly, "When we parted ways, we vowed to marry his son Ranma with one of you three and continue on our respective schools as one!"

"Wait, marry one of us?" Nabiki asked before she looked over at Akane, who appeared mesmerized by the idea.

Kasumi kept rubbing her chin. She'd be angry at him for the injury, but this was the first time he's talked at length to anyone since Akane's incident at school with the pencil sharpener. "Daddy, why didn't you tell any of us about this?"

"I can think of a few reasons." Nabiki again looked to Akane.

Akane was now completely giddy at the prospect. "So what is Ranma like? Is he a martial artist too? Can he fight?"

Nabiki was intrigued as well. "So, he's gonna be ripped, right?"

Akane smirked to Nabiki. "First thing you can think of, right?"

Nabiki snorted. "Well Daddy did engage one of us to him, so these are important questions.

The middle sister looked back to her Father. "So, what else do you know about him? This Ranma boy. Is he handsome, rich, what?"

"I don't know, I've never met the boy," Soun replied.

Nabiki's expression fell flat. "Oh boy, it's going to be as much a surprise for us as it is for him."

Kasumi got up, and left the room for the front door. "I'm going to go get some more first aid supplies from Dr. Tofu."

Not ten seconds later, she came running back, her expression entirely calm in the face of the grizzly-sized Panda Bear that came charging in after her.

Nabiki hadn't been expecting was to see a rather large panda storming in, carrying a petite figure over its shoulder. Then again, if anyone did expect such things to occur, she'd want to contact them so they could discuss their precognitive powers and how best to use them to make a heap load of cash. Sharpish.

Akane tilted her head to one side. "Well, that's something."

Kasumi rounded her petrified Father as, in a swift fluid motion, the panda swung the silent figure slung over its shoulder down onto the floor directly in front of the Tendos and made a rather futile effort to turn around and run back out the door. Futile because that same figure immediately leaped up and kicked the bear in the side of the head, sending it crashing into a wall.

"You're not walking outta here like I'm not your problem anymore, you parasite!" the particularly angry red-haired girl yelled.

While the panda curled up and whimpered in a pain that Nabiki could but imagine, the stranger turned back to the family. "Ah, sorry about this. You're the Tendos, right?"

Soun stared at the redhead, and blinked a few times. "You... you're... Ranma?"

Ranma nodded in an attempt at being amicable. "Ranma Saotome, yes. You were expecting me? I'm really sorry about this, you see-"

Soun fell to his knees and burst into tears. "No, it can't be!"

The sisters Tendo were also confused, wasn't Ranma supposed to be a man? Soun made his despair about this question known almost immediately to everyone in a mile.

"Saotome you fool, how dare you not tell me your son is a transsexual!"

Ranma's expression almost immediately darkened, her blue eyes almost gleaming with murderous intent as all manner of anger brewed inside them like a thunderstorm.

"WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT, ASSHOLE?!" Ranma shrieked as she (possibly he?) cocked back and kicked Soun out the back patio doors. The man of the Tendo house bounced off the tree, bending it like a steel pipe washer, and fell into the pond.

"Daddy!" Kasumi yelped as she rushed to his aid. Nabiki looked from the pond back to Ranma, and decided that she could wait a few years for a suitor.

Akane, however, was impressed.

She smiled and stepped up to Ranma. "Hi, I'm Akane."

She held out her hand. "Do you want to be friends?"

Ranma forgot about her anger when the friendly girl stepped up, and actually smiled a little. "Sure."

 **|Yeah this is gonna be a thing|**

With Kasumi distracted by tending to her Father, and Nabiki calling various Zoo's about purchasing an errant panda bear, Ranma and Akane walked into the Tendo family's dojo. Ranma hummed as she looked around; this was a really nice, sturdy looking dojo. Her old man wasn't talking out his ass when he said they were well off.

Akane had disappeared behind a privacy blind for a moment, and hung her clothes over the top. A moment later she emerged, dressed in a pair of shorts and a sports bra. "So, my Daddy says you're a really good martial artist."

"I've kicked a few faces in during my time, yeah," Ranma replied as she began to stretch. Interesting choice of fighting attire, she noted.

"Okay, let's see what you can do." Akane bowed and then got ready.

Ranma returned the bow, and assumed her own fighting stance. "What I can do, huh?"

"Yeah, don't hold back. I don't want you to get hurt!" She moved in fast and punched straight for Ranma's throat, and Ranma hopped over her effortlessly.

Akane whirled around and swung at Ranma consecutively, and Ranma narrowly avoiding her strikes. "Wow, you're really quick!"

She then launched a kick at Ranma, which was again easily avoided. The flying punch Akane launched from the feint kick however connected solidly with her face, sending her tumbling loudly across the floor.

Back in the Tendo home, Kasumi had finished dragging her dazed father back in when she heard the thumping. "Nabiki, where are Akane and Ranma?"

"They went to the dojo, last I saw," Nabiki replied absently.

Kasumi froze briefly as the dread filled and then left her. "Why did you let them-?"

"Because I don't care."

Kasumi sighed. "Of course."

Ranma rubbed her face as she got up, and sprung forward, escaping under Akane as she tried to smash the top of her head in with a falling kick.

Landing and turning to face her, Ranma smirked. "That was a good clean hit."

Akane beamed. "Don't be shy, you're welcome to hit me back!"

She attacked, jumping in close and punching for Ranma's throat. The strike was parried and Ranma counterattacked, with Akane deflecting it with a raised arm before she threw an elbow into her face. Catching the elbow, Ranma backfisted Akane in the stomach, and let her elbow go to swing her fist up to tag her in the nose, knocking her back a step before kicking her in the chin. Akane caught the kick, however, and spun Ranma down towards the floor.

With cat like agility, Ranma landed on her feet before sweeping Akane off hers. When Akane landed on her back, Ranma grabbed her by her sports bra and held her fist up ready to strike a killing blow to her face.

"Gotcha," Ranma teased.

Akane grabbed her raised fist. "Nope!"

With her other hand she grabbed Ranma by the back of her head and yanked her down into a headbutt, knocking her back. As Ranma scrambled to her feet, Akane grabbed her by her shoulders and kneed her in the stomach. When Ranma doubled over, Akane gleefully grabbed her by the back of her head and yanked her down to meet her knee in the most expedient fashion possible.

Akane smiled as Ranma staggered back, clutching her face. "You're really tough!"

Kasumi walked in, and sighed in relief when she saw Ranma was still intact. "Ranma-chan, that's enough... I really don't want you fighting Akane-"

Ranma snorted into her palm and looked at the blood splattered all over it. She looked from her bloody palm to Akane, who was ready to keep the party going.

When she pulled her hand from her nose and mouth, Ranma wore a big, vicious smile. "It's okay, we're just playing."

She closed the distance fast, and before Akane could defend, punched her twice in the face, each blow whipping her head one way and then the other. The third strike was blocked, and Akane grabbed her arm. Before Akane could counter, Ranma palm-thrust her in the chin, knocking her off her feet, and quickly drilled two lightning fast punches into her stomach, knocking her onto her back.

Sliding back across the polished wood floor, Akane curled her legs and rolled back onto her hands to spring away from the stomp originally intended for her face. When Ranma pursued, Akane jabbed at her with a kick, stopping her advance and setting her up perfectly for the roundhouse that connected with the side of her head and sent her down into the ground.

As Ranma lay face down, Akane grabbed her arm and wrist and pulled it back into a painful wrist and armlock. Using her leverage, Akane leaned down and Ranma's eyes watered as she felt a great deal of pressure on her elbow.

"Gotcha," Akane purred into Ranma's ear as she began to add more pressure.

"Akane, that's enough!" Kasumi warned.

"We're still playing though, I'll be done in just a second..." Akane replied as she leaned into the lock. Any second now, just a little bit more and there would be that delicious, satisfying _break_.

Kasumi was aghast. Mailmen, paramedics, and the occasional passerby were one thing, this was one of father's friends! "Akane! Stop it, you're going to hurt her!"

Akane didn't listen, she was waiting for that crunch.

Wait a minute, where was the crunch? There was supposed to be a blood-curdling crunch. Instead, she heard panting, and looked down to see Ranma looking out the corner of her eye, a sickening grin of her face.

"Harder... come on... do it harder... it really hurts now..." She whispered to Akane.

Akane's eyes widened, and it was in that moment of hesitation that Ranma turned over, lifting Akane up and shoving her onto her stomach. As she tried to get up, Ranma's arms locked around her waist, and suddenly the world was a blur as Ranma lifted her up, over drove her headfirst into the floor in a devastating German Suplex.

Kasumi winced and looked away from the exact moment of impact, but she most certainly heard the wood split underneath the force of the impact. She looked back, and it indeed was as bad as it sounded. Akane was partially imbedded in the floor, the wood splintered beneath her head and shoulders, as Ranma rolled out from under her.

Ranma sat back, panting, as she rubbed her sore arm. "Crazy bitch... you almost broke my arm..."

Kasumi looked over from Ranma to Akane, who looked almost... peaceful where she lay. Her eyes fluttering open, Akane looked over to Ranma, and smiled.

"Next time, I will."

Kasumi looked back and forth between Ranma and Akane. The former let out a laugh, and grinned dangerously down at her. "Sounds like fun!"

The two began to laugh, and Kasumi tilted her head to one side as confusion shoved all of her thoughts to one side of her brain. Wait, what was happening? Ranma almost had his arm snapped by Akane, but he's... laughing? She's laughing? W-what?

"It's a shame you're not a boy," Akane said to Ranma. "I really like you!"

Ranma stopped rubbing her arm. "Oh yeah? Funny you should mention that."

Nabiki then walked in, carrying a mug of hot water. "Hey, Kasumi. You're not going to believe this."

Kasumi looked at Nabiki. "I'm having trouble believing a lot of things right now, what is it?"

Nabiki threw the mug of water onto Ranma.

And that's where the night got interesting.

 **|Wait, this is the end of the chapter? I had more to say|**

Next Time: An engagement!


	2. Part 2

Disclaimer: Hello reader, Ranma ½ is property of Rumiko Takahashi, Studio Deen, Shogakukan, Viz Media, and Madman Entertainment. You haven't been reading other fanfics, have you?

 **Sickly Sweet  
** **Part 2**

It was a rare moment when Nabiki Tendo regretted something, and as she looked upon the now male Ranma Saotome sitting next to his Panda-turned-Father she was regretting immediately dismissing the handsome boy and allowing Akane to take an active interest in him. She looked from him and to her sister, who appeared infatuated with the hunky boy. Ah well, it's not like she's never made use of Akane's broken toys in the past.

Soun was animated again, despite having been kicked so hard he lost all bowel and bladder control for about five minutes. Indeed, he actually appeared to be smiling for the first time in years!

"I have to tell you Saotome, words cannot express how relieved I am to see you and the boy back to normal. To think, cursed while in China!" he exclaimed as Genma held his head in shame.

"So how did you get cursed?" Nabiki asked.

Tears poured down Genma's face, in a fashion not unlike Soun's. "It began a month ago, when we journeyed to China to train at the legendary Jusenkyo training ground!"

"Jusenkyo?" Nabiki and Akane asked.

Genma nodded. "It is regarded as the most difficult and dangerous training ground in the world. Those who set foot in it, come out changed forever..."

Nabiki nodded. "You don't say."

Kasumi noticed a booklet lying on the floor and picked it up to read, as Genma continued his explanation. "Heedless of the danger, and believing Ranma ready for such a dangerous place, we entered the training grounds. However, it was then that tragedy struck!"

Ranma folded his arms and rolled his eyes.

"Suffice to say..." Genma looked down. "When it was over, we were damned by fate to bear these cursed forms, forever."

Ranma hummed loudly. "Hey Pops, you're forgetting a few parts of the story."

"Oh?" Akane's gaze moved from Genma to Ranma, and then back..

"Like that he didn't know what the Springs did until after we got cursed by 'em."

Kasumi shook her head as she read the book. "That can't be right, it says so right here in this guidebook that the springs have special properties. Anyone who falls in a spring will be cursed to turn into whatever first fell into it."

Genma looked over to her. "Wait, it does?"

Nabiki stared at Genma. "You can't read?"

"I can't read Chinese, thank you very much!" Genma loudly corrected.

Nabiki pointed at Kasumi. "Neither can she."

Kasumi held up the book. "There's a Japanese translation on the next page."

Akane frowned. "Ranma, your dad is an idiot."

"That's the nicest thing anyone's said about him all week," Ranma replied in a tone that invoked a deceased cooking implement.

Soun just laughed, as if he was blocking everything but his happiness. He had so precious little of it left these days. "This curse is no problem at all!" he declared. "After all, you are a boy right now, so the effect must only be temporary! I can see no reason that the engagement cannot continue. Please, allow me to properly introduce my daughters so that you can choose your bride to be. This is my oldest, Kasumi-"

Akane put her arm around Ranma's and pulled herself close to him. "I'll be his wife."

If anyone present had listened very, very closely they might well have heard the remaining synapses in Soun Tendo's brain related to joy, happiness and similar emotional states snap like a postman's arm. He looked between the two of them as Ranma reacted to Akane's declaration with flattered surprise.

"But I'm cursed."

"I think it's really cool."

Ranma blinked and stared at Akane. "You're a weird girl, you know."

Akane just pouted and pressed herself against his arm. "But I'm cute, right?"

Ranma looked down to where her chest was pushing up against his arm, and back to her face as his own became flushed. "Really cute!"

Kasumi quickly tried to intervene. "Ah! I'll be Ranma's fiancée!"

Nabiki and Soun looked at Kasumi. Both knew what she was trying to do, and while the latter quickly felt something resembling relief in that his oldest was stepping up to the plate to save their chance at continuing their family legacy, the former knew it was useless.

Akane laughed, and then stopped, leveling a piercing gaze at Kasumi. "No, you won't."

Kasumi hesitated under Akane's scrutiny, before the youngest Tendo sister repeated herself with a lower, more direct tone.

"No. You won't."

The panic that drove Kasumi to intervene left in lieu of resignation, and weariness reclaimed her. Figuratively and physically, Kasumi backed away from Ranma and Akane. Nabiki just nodded to Kasumi, affirming that she made the right choice in not putting herself between Akane and anything she wanted to play with.

Soun began to weep. That poor, poor boy didn't know what he was in for, and there was nothing Soun could do about it. Not one single damned thing! Just like all the others he'd be deceived by her wretched smile! She was like a pitcher plant for people. Lured them in by appearing to be friendly, and only when it was much too late did any of them ever realise the terrible mistake they had made.

Genma was confused at the exchange, and how it morphed through its duration. However, he did not ignore the flag that was Kasumi's weary look as Akane kissed Ranma on the cheek. He looked to Soun.

"Is there something wrong with your youngest, Tendo?"

Soun let out an unstable laugh, and then began to laugh hysterically. "She's a demon, Saotome."

Genma recoiled. "What?"

"Daddy?" Akane asked in confusion.

"No!" Soun pointed at her. "This... this thing is a monster! A manipulative, sadistic spawn of whatever demon raped my wife when I was unaware!"

He then lunged forward and began to strangle Akane. "I cannot, I will not allow this... this thing to carry on the legacy of our schools!"

Kasumi broke into tears of joy as Akane struggled in her Father's grasp, while Ranma recoiled in shock. Nabiki just stared, like she always did, and did nothing else.

"Daddy...!" Akane gasped as Soun tightened his hold.

"I am not your Father! You did not come from me! I should've thrown you from a cliff when I first laid eyes on you!" Soun yelled as he throttled the last bit of life from her. "Die! Die! Die! Die!"

Outside of Soun's delusion, both Saotome men grew worried as the patriarch of the Tendo family began to drool as if he'd just injected heroin straight into his dick. Ranma tapped on Soun's shoulder and then looked to Akane. "Your Dad's weird."

"He'll do this from time to time, you just gotta make sure he doesn't soil himself," Nabiki said.

"Ew, no," Ranma quickly said.

"So, since we're engaged, do you want to sleep in my room?" Akane asked her new fiancé, mercifully changing the subject away from adult incontinence.

Kasumi let out a strangled sound that almost sounded like a whimper. She was in fact suppressing the urge to protest again. She'd been lucky once today. Pushing that fortune a second time seemed unwise.

Ranma blushed brightly at Akane's offer. "S-sleep in your room, the first night? I-is that okay?"

Akane nodded as she gave him a surprisingly seductive smile. "I really like you, Ranma, so yeah."

Ranma, while catching the attention of more than a girl or two since puberty welcomed him to the beautiful people club, had never even so much as held hands with a girl before today and now his fiancée was inviting her to sleep in her room (with her, presumably). He did what any other typical teenaged boy would in his situation. His nose began to bleed.

"Huh, my nose is bleeding."

Akane frowned. "I hear that's a sign of fatigue, you must be exhausted."

He got up, stretched, and yawned. "Well, I have had a long trip here, so I think I'll crash early."

"But it's not even dark yet," Nabiki wryly noted.

"Early to bed, early to rise! Besides, we have to get you registered for school in the morning." Akane cheerfully said as she got up and took Ranma by the arm. "Come on, it's this way."

The two slowly left the room, and were heard running up the stairs. As Akane's door slammed shut, Genma looked to Soun. "Well, looks like our legacy will be continued sooner than we thought, eh Tendo?"

Soun's only response was his distant smile and the tears pouring down his cheeks, as in his mind he butchered Akane with a fireman's axe, while Kasumi and Ranma exchanged wedding vows at the altar.

 **|Hey it's me the page break again, just wanted to get my gimmick goin' and-|**

Next Chapter: School!


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